I’m not so naive as to think that everything said on email lists or anywhere on the internet for that matter is true but it does feel like a blow to read obvious falsehoods written by people I know or have met in real life even if I wouldn’t call them friends. I feel angry to read lies and gross misrepresentations in places that are closer to my heart because I really value honesty and authenticity and I don’t want to question everything I read there. I want to take people’s thoughts and shared experiences at face value and known lies can taint that. I also don’t want others I care about to be duped either. Sometimes I’m embarrassed for the writer when I read these ridiculous statements and other times I want to publicly reveal the truth, like it’s my responsibility because I met them in real life and indirectly introduced them to one place they fraudulently post.

Do they think no one will know or that they aren’t so obvious? Despite knowing I’m probably reading maybe they think I won’t notice or are counting on me not saying anything? Are they so delusional to actually believe the fiction they’re sharing? Could they be mixing medications? Are they so lonely and unsure of who they really are that they would go to such lengths to make people believe there is more to them than there really is?

I’m guess it’s a combination of thinking I won’t notice, semi delusional in believing some of what they are posting, lonely and still trying to figure out who they are and their values. All this seems to have made them fickle, needy and an imitator. It’s sad really and perhaps worth more compassion than I’ve so far felt for them. I suppose I have more to contemplate on this…

I feel like I should add that none of my friends know this person in real life or online as far as I know.

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4 Responses to Authenticity

  1. Lindsay says:

    Luckily I don’t really know anyone who has done this, but I wanted to comment and say I think I would find this pretty irritating too. I have a friend who does this in real life though. She will sit and make up stories about things she’s done that I know are obvious lies or exaggerations. But she’s talking to other people and I feel like I would look like the bad guy if I came out and interrupted her story and said something, you know? I think in the end, other people start to figure out their true nature too and they’re only hurting themselves.

    I do sometimes find it hard to be authentic on the internet myself and wonder if I really come across online the same as I do in person

  2. Annie says:

    It’s true that they are hurting themselves by doing it. It’s just so embarrassing to watch it happen. You’re more patient than I to maintain a friendship with someone who’s consistently like this. Do you just brush it off or do you ask for clarification at any point- like when you aren’t in front of other people?

  3. Katey says:

    Wow. All through reading that, I thought, “I could have written that.” I’ve decided not to let known falsehoods go unchecked. It’s so frustrating.

    (haven’t been to your blog in awhile. It’s so pretty!)

  4. Annie says:

    And Katey- you do it so well. Maybe honesty is better than turning a blind eye afterall. *sigh*

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